I’m the type of person that occasionally sits in a mud puddle yowling about having soggy drawers. Today was one of those days. The exam in my toughest subject was today, and it was hard. Of course, you say, exams are supposed to be hard. There’s hard, and then there’s hyperventilate/panic/5 hours isn’t enough/I’m not sure 50 hours would be enough/pass the Xanax please. Not only was the test nightmarish, 2 companies I’d applied to for summer internships sent rejection emails. All of the sudden, I got some momentum. I went ahead and felt sorry for myself for the ridiculous amounts of debt I’m incurring to be here. And yes, I’m a skosh envious of my friends who’ve found love (true or temporary) at Darden, not to mention how guilty I’ve been feeling about being a terrible friend to my pre-Darden people…the more I thought about it, the more things I could add to my let’s-feel-bad Mud Puddle List.
Since I don’t do things halfway, my petulant internal tantrum continued at the gym. I asked myself when it would be MY TURN to get a job, to excel academically, to go on a date or two, to feel like I was succeeding at just SOME part of life lately. In one of those moments of clarity (that almost caused me to fall off the stair mill), I realized that my turn is now. My turn has always been now. I just forgot to have faith.
So today was a Double Hard Day, indeed. News flash: Darden is hard. And has the potential to help you feel really bad if you are already so inclined to be very hard on yourself, strive for perfection, and compare yourself to others. I’m pretty sure it has the potential to make you feel very good, too – if you are already inclined to keep a good sense of humor, a balanced perspective, a strong helping of gratitude and some faith. It may be that I didn’t rock the exam or the class….ok, fine. Can’t change that now – what I can change now is the way I feel about it. And, if you already have soggy drawers from a Mud Puddle Moment, like me…. why not take a few more minutes to have fun playing in the mud while you’re there?